It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
