i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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