She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
