I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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