That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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