i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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