The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
