kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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