sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
