I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
