david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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