Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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