I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
