If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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