oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
