dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
So squirting runs in the family.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
