hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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