He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
