You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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