just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
