In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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