would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
