Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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