nut hugger
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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