I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
