i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize