No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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