So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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