Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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