Walk of Shame. In a state park.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
