5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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