the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
