Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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