i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
