yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Sacagawea was the original milf.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
