perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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