Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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