He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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