talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
