Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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