Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
