Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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