U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
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