i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just had sex on a roof
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
