Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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