sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
i out mim tonsoeep
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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