I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
