I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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