Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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