No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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